


Consequences

by babybrotherdean



Series: $200 [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Bestiality, Hurt Dean, M/M, Other, Porn Watching, Rape Aftermath, Sam is no longer soulless
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-20
Updated: 2016-01-20
Packaged: 2018-05-15 03:27:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5769526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babybrotherdean/pseuds/babybrotherdean
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s obviously a porn website, flashy banners and dirty ads and a couple notifications on his pop-up blocker, but there’s something a little odd about the whole thing. Dean is a creature of habit, and it tends to carry over to his choices in porn, and loathe as Sam might be to admit it, even with the page half-loaded, he can already tell that it isn’t Dean’s type of place. It raises more questions than it answers, and when the title of the featured video appears- <i>“Hot Blonde Stuffed With HUGE DOG COCK And Face-Fucked”</i>- he feels his stomach turn.</p>
<p>-</p>
<p>Sam starts to learn about some of the horrifying things he did without a soul.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Consequences

**Author's Note:**

> _OH MY GOD. I NEED A FOLLOW UP FIC WHERE SAM IS NO LONGER SOULLESS AND REALIZES WHAT HE DID TO DEAN WITH THE DOBERMAN. I NEED DEAN TO BE TERRIFIED AND SO SO SCARED AND HELPLESS TOWARDS SAM, AND DOESNT LET SAM TOUCH HIM. PLEASE ALLY I BEG OF YOU!_
> 
> Not a fix-it. Just. Aftermath.

Sam knows that his brother’s never been all that big on physical affection- years of growing up with a father as strict as theirs in the hunting life weaned that out of him- but he can’t remember a time when it was ever this bad.

He doesn’t remember too much from the last year- not much at all, actually- but Dean doesn’t touch him anymore. Doesn’t even really look him in the eyes. He’s had to start making a conscious effort not to move too quickly, because as he’s learned, his brother will flinch away. It hurts every time, but what’s worse is that every single time it happens, the look in Dean’s eyes is clear as anything, and he isn’t usually this easy to read.

Dean is _scared._ Dean’s terrified of him, and Sam doesn’t know _why._ He’s got no idea what he possibly could’ve done to push his brother to this, and it’s slowly driving him insane. He doesn’t know how to exist like this, how to function when Dean seems like he’s on the verge of bolting at any given moment when they’re in the same room.

With no clear way to move forward, Sam does what he always does: he decides to look for a case.

They’re still lingering in South Dakota, but they’ve left Bobby’s house behind to give the man some peace and quiet, shacked up in a motel near the border. Sam’s still a little surprised that Dean even agreed to share a room with him, separate beds or not, but he isn’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth when every moment with his brother feels like it shouldn’t be his to begin with.

Dean’s out, as he usually is these days, so Sam’s on his own in the room as he cracks open his laptop for the first time in what feels like years. Nothing’s out of the ordinary until he opens up his browser, fingertips already poised to search for any mysterious deaths, but there’s something off about the display that he can’t quite place until he looks at his bookmarks tabs.

Most of them are reference sites for lore, and are exactly as he remembers leaving them. Far to the right, though, nearly tucked away in a little drop-down menu, is one he doesn’t recognize. It’s listed simply as “Dean,” and though Sam’s first instinct is that his brother’s been on his computer and probably saved something for his own purposes, there’s a tight feeling in his chest that tells him he’s wrong.

In the end, it’s morbid curiosity that has him clicking the link, and as the page starts to load, he nearly closes it out of reflex.

It’s obviously a porn website, flashy banners and dirty ads and a couple notifications on his pop-up blocker, but there’s something a little odd about the whole thing. Dean is a creature of habit, and it tends to carry over to his choices in porn, and loathe as Sam might be to admit it, even with the page half-loaded, he can already tell that it isn’t Dean’s type of place. It raises more questions than it answers, and when the title of the featured video appears- _“Hot Blonde Stuffed With HUGE DOG COCK And Face-Fucked”_ \- he feels his stomach turn.

Sam’s fingers are trembling when he mouses over the play button. When the video starts, he thinks he might throw up.

It’s Dean. It’s horribly, unmistakably _Dean,_ and there’s something wrong with him, eyelids drooping a little bit, breathing hard, strapped to some kind of contraption that’s got his legs spread wide. Sam’s got his sound off, and it’s all the more startling when a huge Doberman comes on screen and starts sniffing around his brother.

The video title already tells him what’s going to happen, but he can’t tear his eyes away. It only gets worse when the dog starts to mount Dean, though, because that’s when he watches himself step into the frame, and the end of the title suddenly makes a horrifying amount of sense.

He forces himself to watch the entire video. It feels like punishment, but every time he thinks of clicking away, of slamming his laptop shut and throwing it across the room, he remembers that his brother had to _live_ this- had to live the hell Sam’s only watching as an unattached third party. As unattached as he can be, anyways, considering he has to sit and watch himself stuff his own cock down his brother’s throat while Dean can do nothing to fight back.

Even after the video ends, Sam stares at the screen for a long few seconds, eyes locked on the little arrow that’s asking him if he wants to play it again. Finally manages to drag his eyes away and close his laptop.

Barely makes it to the bathroom on shaky legs before he throws up everything he’s eaten today.

His head is spinning- confusion and horror and self-disgust and guilt; understanding for why Dean won’t even look at him anymore. A detached sort of wonder at the fact that his brother’s still here at all.

Sam doesn’t know what happened in the past year- has no idea how he could’ve done something so vile to the most important person in his life with no recollection of it ever happening- but as the video plays on an endless loop at the backs of his eyelids and Dean’s betrayed, tear-stained face haunts him, he gains a renewed determination to find out.

**Author's Note:**

> And everyone is still hurting. Whoops.


End file.
